What Other Terrible Humans Are Saying
Not real reviews — yet. Krampus is still compiling evidence.
“My sister still hasn't explained the group chat vote. She doesn't need to. Krampus already knows.”
“My husband read one line about the garage and said 'okay, fair' — then actually made progress on it within the week. Worth every penny.”
“Uncomfortably accurate.”
“Sent this to my boss anonymously. I have since been promoted. I assume these events are unrelated.”
“Got my roommate 3 Months of Krampus over the dishes situation. Letter two brought up something from letter one and I actually gasped.”
“Ordered the Digital tier at 11pm the night before our White Elephant. Read it out loud at the party. Devastating. 10/10.”
“Ordered this for my HOA president. I will not elaborate further.”
“Got my best friend Year-Round Krampus as a joint birthday/Christmas gift. She now forwards me every letter like it's a prestige TV recap.”
“Sent this to my wife about the Stanley cup situation. She currently owns eleven. The Haus was not impressed. Neither am I, honestly, but I said nothing until now.”
“My girlfriend has started and abandoned four hobbies this year. Krampus remembered every one of them by letter two. I did not have to say a word.”
“Sent the Digital tier to my ex, completely unprompted, eight months post-breakup. Some might call this unresolved. I call it a public service.”
“My boyfriend's fantasy football commentary has not once concerned an actual football game since August. Krampus noticed. I did not have to.”